Photo courtesy of Brad Howe Photography
It irks me when I hear friends and family of engaged couples give the “sage” advice that they should not expect to eat on their own wedding day. While it’s true that there have been plenty of couples who have missed their wedding meals, with planning and a good event director, newlyweds can more than just hope for – they can downright expect – an opportunity to eat on their big day.
The Right to Eat
As the guests of honor, newlyweds are entitled to some special attention. Appetizers can be presented while they wait in seclusion for introductions and can even be available during photo time (provided attention is given to the photography schedule). At more casual events, couples even choose to join their guests during the cocktail period.
Whether a meal is seated or stationed, the newlyweds should be served first and in fact have a responsibility to commence eating before their guests can begin. Most caterers will offer to fix a plate to order from stations or buffet setups, and the couple should sit for a few minutes and enjoy their food before getting up and visiting with other tables. During a seated meal, care should be taken NOT to get up between every course and visit a new table because often the servers are waiting to present your next course before they serve the rest of the room. Your courtesy in visiting with your guests could very well slow down your entire dinner period!
So eat darn it! If for no other reason than to make your guests feel like they are allowed to eat!
Make the Schedule Comfortable for YOU
There are even options for those couples who are “too nervous” to eat, perhaps due to their anticipated first dance or other formalities. In most cases the dances can actually be scheduled before dinner, and in the event that it will dramatically reduce anxiety, it’s highly advisable.
Of course, wedding dresses are uncomfortable, and the lack of desire to consume a huge meal while wearing one is understandable. At the very least, your caterer may be willing (if permitted by local health laws) to provide you with a takeaway basket of each item served during the reception. It’s definitely worth looking into.
The thought that you have to miss your own wedding meal is a complete myth. You can and should plan wisely, and give yourself the gift of a meal period during which you can unwind and enjoy the fruits of your planning.
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